As I fell asleep

by Jayda

Last night as I lay in bed,
a million thoughts running through my head,
unable to quiet or soften the sound
of anxiety and fears circling around and around,
an image came to my mind,
of a beautiful, wonderful, gentle Divine
resting her hand softly on my head
and stroking my hair to soothe me

“Mother, are you there?” I thought inwardly.
I hoped She would respond.
My search for Her had been desperate and long
as I tried to make sense of religion and God.
I wanted to know: is She really there?
Does She really care?
Does She know me by name?
Does She know all my pain?

Though I heard no voice in response,
had no foreign thought enter my mind,
the image of Mother stroking my hair
rocked me gently to sleep, embraced by the Divine.

As I fell asleep last night,
I imagined Her fingers stroking my hair,
whispering that She knows me and She really does care
about all my anxieties, my fears, and my pains,
that She loves me no matter my path,
that She loves me no matter my mistakes.

As I fell asleep last night,
I longed for Her presence.
And in my mind,
She was there.

Woman sleeping in bed with white sheets and pillows